The Heart of Family Culture:  The Love Connection 

For me, the path of meditation offers an inner field in which to practice the skills of self-awareness, self-regulation, and integration. Finding my way along this path, I have discovered a wellspring of insight, courage, and strength. Sometimes, in difficult situations, I would open my mouth to say something to one of my sons and be surprised to hear my voice speak wisdom I didn’t even know I knew! How can this be so? 

There is more and more current research confirming that meditation improves our physical and emotional health, while regular long-term practice actually changes the structures of the brain that control our moods. Contemplative practice strengthens a neurological circuit that generates social awareness and compassion for others. Mindfulness meditation encourages perspective taking. 

Emotional health, mood-control, social awareness, compassion for others and the ability to find a new perspective: we wish there was a pill we could take to offer all these qualities! Really, there is—meditation. However, it requires at least 10 minutes of attention each day. There are many avenues for meditation instruction, and I encourage you to explore possibilities that appeal to you. I will also offer you a simple step-by-step process that I call “Heartfulness” meditation. With a little experience, this can be practiced at any time during the day, and with your eyes open. As parents, especially, and teachers as well, we need a meditation that we can do while fully engaged with the children and with our eyes open! We can find the calm center in the midst of the cyclic movements of life. 

If we choose the path of meditation, we have a very real possibility to be our best selves for our children. Best does not mean perfect, though. For me, best means self-observation, self-moderation, and compassion for my own shortcomings. If I can develop patience for myself, the humility to recognize my mistakes, and resilience to learn from them, then I have a better chance at modeling these qualities as I am in relationship with my children. Heartfulness meditation begins with self-awareness and compassion. This creates a strong, flexible foundation for sensitive awareness and responsive-ness with our child.

Hearfulness Meditation Instructions 

• Allow your consciousness to rest in your heart. Feel the movement
of your breath, as your lungs expand and contract. 

• Be aware that you are being “rocked” by your breath; this is goodness. Focus on the feeling of goodness or love, not the concept .

• Stay with this felt- experience of goodness or love.
• As sensation, feelingor thought arises, bring it into the peaceful resonance of this heart-space. • There is room for all of life in this heart-expanding meditation 

One further step 

• While in the meditative state, with the eye of your heart, imagine a difficult situation in your family life. 

• Bring this difficulty into the peaceful resonance of your heart
• Ask the wisdom of your heart how it can help 

Your own heart knows the way. Trust it!